Something Fishy is Going on Here

A month ago, I had a feeling that I needed to create a dating profile. I choose OkCupid because it’s free. I had no idea why I was even doing it, but I watched my body as I created it. Last year, I had created a profile on there as well but had deleted the entire account. I found the number of responses overwhelming. I was on overload, and it didn’t feel good to be on there, so within 4 hours of having my profile posted, I removed it.

This time was different. As I was creating my new profile, I decided that I was going to post every fucking weird photo I’ve ever taken, the ones with the goofiest and dumbest expressions. No beautiful and sophisticated professionally done headshots, just a bunch of goofy, dumbass photos. I also didn’t lock myself in by choosing a “type.” Within the app, you can make selections as to the type of person you are attracted to. I didn’t bother with details. I do have a “type,” but that comes from my mind, not from my body. I have no idea who my body will respond to.

This alone helped minimize the number of responses I received. The first day I had 26 guys reach out to me via messaging within the app. I skimmed through them. I wasn’t able to respond to those who just initiated with the word, “Hi.” They didn’t give me much to respond to except to say, “Hi” back. I chose to ignore all of those. Then, there were the guys that were commenting on my beauty. I chose to ignore all of them, too. Guys were also giving me their phone number and telling me that they were all mine if I wanted them! Uh. No.

Is anyone reading my profile or noticing that I have a shit load of goofy photos?!

 After a few hours, I came across three people that did look at my pictures and had sent me a text asking me a few questions regarding my profile and my pictures. I was excited to have something to respond to! I wrote to all three, and within a couple of hours, I had three dates lined up for the following week. After the first wave of responses, I received messages from 79 different guys. I didn’t even have the energy to read any of the new responses. I tried, but it was pointless. I figured that I would go out on a date with each of the three that I had engaged in a conversation with and go from there.

I went on three dates with three different guys. All three were very lovely with great personalities, and I could see myself getting closer to any of them. However, it was my 2nd date/2nd guy that stood out.

My 2nd date/2nd guy wanted to meet for coffee. It was a coffee date at a coffee shop about a 6-minute walk from my apartment. The morning of our date, I wasn’t feeling it. I wanted to cancel. My mind wanted to cancel. I thought about it, and I didn’t find myself contacting my date to cancel, so I watched myself get ready. I decided to walk to the coffee shop. Ugh. Mind you, this is a 6-minute walk, but in Phoenix at 110 degrees with 49% humidity, it was a bad idea.

By the time, I got to the coffee shop, I was drenched in sweat. Ugh! As soon as I walked in, I turned to see my date walking towards me. I put out my hand to stop him, and I told him that I was sweaty and that I needed to go to the bathroom first. He stood back, nodded, and sat back down.

As I was in the bathroom, drying myself off with paper towels, I was struck by my date. He saw me. Yes, he saw me walk in, but his expression was that he saw my soul. As I was drying off, I kept reciting in my head … Oh, fuck. Fuck. Fuck. This is NOT what I was expecting.

I went back out and met up with my date. He walked with me to the counter and bought me an iced coffee. I reached to get a couple of menus to fan myself while I was ordering and the barista asked me if I was ok and needed some water. I told him, water would be awesome and that I was okay, but that I had made my first mistake of the day by walking there. And without missing a beat, my date said, “I hope I’m not your 2nd mistake of the day!” Oh, my god, how I laughed! He laughed, too.

We sat for an hour together, talking and laughing. He showed me photos on his phone of his teenage kids. He came across a photo of a whole fish that was deep fried with the head and eyes still attached. I commented on it. He asked if I had ever ordered fish that way. Nope. Never. He then asked me if I wanted to try it. I said, “Sure. I’ll try anything once.” He said, “Let’s go now. Do you want to go now?” I didn’t hesitate. Yup. Let’s do it!

I jumped in his car, and he drove us to a restaurant that served the whole fried fish. He ordered two plates of fish. When our food was served, he showed me how to dig in and where not to dig in. After we had finished our dinner, we sat talking for a bit. And he confessed to me that he had just tested me. He wanted to know if I was spontaneous and adventurous. He didn’t care if I didn’t like the fish—what he wanted to know is if I would try something unfamiliar for the experience of it.

My whole body lit up. I laughed my ass off when he told me that! Fuck. I just met my match! I’m the one who tests people. People don’t test me. LOL! As a 5/1, I’m skeptical about people who enter my life. Therefore, I tend to test them to see if and how they fit into my life. This guy got ME! After a couple of hours, he drove me home but teased me a little about walking home. He was delightful in so many ways!

We went on several more dates. In one week, he expanded my mind more than any person I have ever been with! I have never met someone who could keep up with me, in humor, in seriousness, and in playfulness. He wasn’t even my “type.” And as it turns out, I wasn’t his either. However, we have similar life experiences and views on life.

After a week, I was bracing myself when I told him that I live Human Design. His reaction? He knew what it was! He had discovered it after he had gone through his divorce. He had been married 20 years and realized that he didn’t know who he was. He needed to know, and Human Design found him.

I suspected that he was a Projector, but he told me he was a Generator. I asked him if he had his birth time correct and he informed me that it was. My body didn’t agree with his answer, so I asked him if he would mind double checking it. Turns out the time was incorrect, and he is Projector. Long ago, he had wondered about that, because the Generator info didn’t resonate within him. He didn’t look further into it. He just figured it wasn’t a tool for him.

A few hours of him knowing that he’s a Projector, he went online to read what his new aura type was all about. Yup, NOW it resonated with him. He’s has a 5/1 profile and is a single definition. (I have the same profile and definition.) He has a defined G-Center and Ego (Channel 51-25) and then, everything else is wide open.

He is very aware of that he can focus and absorb energy and when we are together he checks in with me to see how I’m feeling. I do the same with him because I’m very aware that I can burn him out. And because of the projection field we both experience, we’ve been communicating a lot. It appears we can hear one another and we ask each other lots of questions if we aren’t clear about something that was said. The projections we place on one another seem to be quite fluid. They will set in and as we get new information they are readjusted, and a new projection will form.

Last night, after 3 weeks of hanging out together, we had a minor hiccup. It was minor because I was able to tell him how I felt and we worked through it together. I’ve never had that experience before. We both have an open Solar Plexus which means that if we are not operating correctly, we can easily play nice and avoid all confrontation. We’ve been in relationships that didn’t allow us to communicate our true feelings. Everyone I have ever been romantically involved with, including my ex-husband, would tell me how I should feel. I wasn’t allowed to have my own feelings. They were regarded as irrational and stupid.

The men I get involved with always seem to assume that I will marry them one day, but none of them have actually asked me if that’s what I want. They project that field onto me. This guy is different. We love being in one another’s company. We love exploring DTPHX together. We love listening to music together. We love talking to one another. We love savoring the present moment with one another. We have admitted to one another that our minds wander into what the future might look like with us being together, but we also realize that our minds are just running out to play. We have no idea what the future will hold, and I’m just in awe that I met someone who is comfortable with that idea as I am.

 

Public Human Design Forums

A friend of mine, Devon Wright, is hosting a weekly public Human Design forum on Fridays at 1900 GMT (12 p.m. AZ). When I was in John Martin’s 2015 Jedi class, Devon ran our weekly class forums for over a year.  He is gifted with amazing insight so when I found out that he was going to run the open forum format I was super excited! Unfortunately, I wasn’t able to attend last Friday, but I watched the recording this morning and it was so good!!! I wish I hadn’t missed it. Check out last week’s forum!

Inter-Type Interaction with Devon Wright

Human Design Unleashed Studios presents “The Way of the Generator with Devon Wright” on Friday, June 30th at 1900 GMT and is followed by a Q&A and open discussion.

You can join the forum in two ways.

  1. You can log into the forum as a guest and you will be able to watch and listen to what’s happening in the forum. You will have access to interact using the chat window.

  2. If you are an Unleashed Patron Saint, you can login in with your username and password and you will have microphone rights and first priority when it comes to asking Devon questions. Patron Saints will also have influence over the topics that are covered as a group and the overall direction of the forum.

You can become an Unleashed Patron Saint by giving a $20 recurring monthly donation to Human Design Unleashed Studios or a single $20 donation will give you access for one month. You decide what feels correct for you.

If you want the latest info regarding the forums, please make sure to like Human Design Unleashed Studios on Facebook! Also, there’s a lot of cool stuff there, too!

Twitter

I added a Twitter account … @HDWarrior13. A few friends suggested that I tweet my blog posts and my body approved of their suggestions.

When I went to Twitter to create an account, I discovered that I had created a one over 19 months ago!

I’m not sure how I’m going to use it. However, as my body responds to the world, I’ll add stuff there that I probably won’t add here, so if you want to be part of my journey connect with me there, too.

 

 

My Reflection and Her Projection

moon-reflection-4

During my third year of deconditioning (I’m in my 5th), I reached out to a new friend (1/3 Reflector), and we Skyped for a few hours. She lives in Denmark. Our conversations tend to revolve around Human Design and our experiences, her as a Reflector and mine as a Manifesting Generator.

As we were talking, I started to slowly feel the build of energy from my friend, some very radiant sexual energy was coming off of her. We weren’t even discussing sex. I thought … Well, that’s interesting. It was a little distracting, and enjoyable.

After we had said our goodbyes and I walked away from my computer, I realized that the sexual energy I felt coming from her was MY ENERGY being amplified and reflected! I was distracted by MY energy! Too funny!

I always think back to that experience when she talks to me about how people can’t see her and how they see their own reflection in her. My experience with her has made me hyper aware of our open centers, defined centers and how they are amplified, not just with her, but with everyone.

Now, I can feel her sample my energy. It happens every time I talk to her. So, when I do talk to her, I make sure I have the energy to talk and that I feel energetically solid, calm and that I’m not sexually charged (LOL) or operating in fear or pressure. If I’m not in a good mood or not feeling well, I let her know, and we make tentative plans to speak another day. Or if I am feeling fear and pressure, I let her know, and she can decide if she wants to talk (sample) to me.

Yesterday, we talked for several hours and we discussed her being a Reflector and my 5/1 projections and how they seem sort of alike, but aren’t at all!

As a 5/1, EVERYONE places projections and expectations on me. Everyone creates an elaborate story (projections and expectations) about me and thinks that it is me and my reality. These stories can be very vivid! As I continue living this experiment, the people that are incorrect for me place their projections of me onto me without ever asking me if their information is valid. They make the assumption that it is. They are not interested in pursuing a discussion. However, those that are correct for me actually make an effort to ask me questions to find out if their assumptions are accurate. If they aren’t, they are capable of making adjustments to their old projections/expectations and can place a new one on me. They continue to make changes as we get to know one another and at some point, my sacral approves of their projections and expectations.

My Reflector friend samples EVERYONE with all of her openness. People have a difficult time seeing her because what they see and feel is their reflection. They think that she is exactly like them. They are surprised when they find out she doesn’t feel the way same. She samples them and is constantly changing throughout the day. Per our conversations, what seems to be consistent is that in a group setting, she can feel the heartbeat of a group and can pinpoint the areas of a group dynamic that isn’t working.

Yesterday, she was telling me how she felt about the number of homeless people in the US. She was in the US last year a couple of times, and she was talking to me about how I live in a country with no safety net and that the safety net that we do have is all an illusion. There is a net, but with huge holes, anyone can fall through. In her home country of Denmark, there is a safety net, and it has tiny holes. I agreed with her. (Earlier in the morning, I had a discussion with another friend about the homeless and how I could help out with her volunteer work.) Denmark does have a homeless population, but it is very small. She went into detail how the Danish government helps its people. My body resonated hearing her talk about it. She picked up that it was on my mind. She carries a tremendous amount of wisdom and insight.

I also love hearing her talk about the classes that she teaches. She’s been coming to the US to teach Meta-Health, and she’s incorporated Human Design into it, too. She can walk into a room and know how a group collectively feels. She’ll tell me about the adjustments she made because of it, changing the order of her teachings or how she needed to address a topic differently. Her aura is fascinating! If I walk into a group, I’m the one who doesn’t know how I’m going to behave!!!

When she’s taken in too much information, she grounds herself in nature. She lives in the middle of nowhere, and she builds a fire in her backyard to relax and recharge.

I am very fortunate and grateful to have such a close friend that is a Reflector because they make up less than 1% of the population. There is so little information about Reflectors because of it, and the number of people who know they are a Reflector is nonexistent.