To Human Design or Not

hd-study

Every once in a while, I’ll meet someone who appears to be interested in learning about the Human Design System. They’ll ask me about it, and I’ll have a positive sacral response for me to share. However, in our discussion I find that they can quickly get defensive and they want to prove that HD is wrong in some way. They want to argue with me about it.

I’ll flat out tell them, There’s nothing to argue about, and I have nothing to prove. Human Design isn’t for everyone, and it’s ok. Just because it exists doesn’t mean you have to agree with it or live it. It’s just a tool. As soon as I make that clear, I can feel their auras immediately relax. And we move on to a new topic of conversation.

However, Human Design is for me. Human Design found me. I didn’t find it. As a Manifesting Generator, it came at me. I didn’t even know it existed. The moment I came into contact with Human Design, I could feel the information resonating within my body. It’s either something you resonate with or not.

When I had my first Foundation reading, I knew that Human Design was the tool I had been searching for. At the time, I had no idea who I was anymore, and I didn’t know how to be ME. How do I start? I’d spent my whole life playing nice, doing what other people wanted me to do, committing to things that were destroying me, etc. I was lost in all of my conditioning. My emotional pain was excruciating which is why HD found me. The main question on my mind at the time was, Who am I?

In my first year of deconditioning, I found the Human Design System to be cute. My mind devoured all of the details, so many details! I was obsessed with all the information and facts I could find. I wanted to run everyone’s chart! I told everyone I knew about Human Design, whether they wanted to hear about it or not! I had no clue as to what I was getting myself into. I picked the information that I liked and pretty much ignored the rest.

In my second year, I was fucked. I fell into a very deep and very dark depressive state. As I was studying, I had come to the realization that I had never lived a day in my life as my “true self.” I was suffocating in all of my open centers and my defined centers weren’t that healthy either. Internally, I was in hell.

But in my third year, it was my environment and relationships that drastically changed. As a result, my mind became overwhelmed with so much uncertainty. My body felt fine! The only way I was able to survive was to wait to respond in the NOW. It was that year that I learned to live in the present moment and to understand what that meant. I learned to pay attention to how my body was feeling in the moment and I started letting go of my mind. For the first time, I was trusting my design!

I am currently in my fourth year of deconditioning, and there’s no going back now! I couldn’t even if I tried! I can feel myself generating all of the time now. The first three years, I felt it in spurts. Now, I can feel my aura attracting and enveloping people all around me. However, not everyone is for me, and I’m not for everyone. My body knows when someone is correct for me. My positive sacral response is loud. Their auras make my body sing!

Next year, I’ll begin my 5th year of the deconditioning process with three more years to go. I have no idea what to expect or what my life will look like, nor do I let my mind run away with those thoughts. My body is content in the present. However, it is interesting to reflect on the past. I think back when I first came into contact with HD; I could never have imagined what my life would look like now. It’s been turned upside down and inside out.

However, Human Design isn’t for everyone. Human Design is a tool that works for me. I resonate with it, and that’s ok.

 

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